Day #317

Hey there!

I've been in a hell of a lot of pain today, just getting back into the swing of things. It's quite hard to feel motivated when I find it hard to move, but I still managed to get to my lecture. 

This evening a group of us went to play pool in the pier. It was a nice way to take my mind off of the pain, but it still niggled away. Luckily Will was there and as soon as I had enough he was there for me and came back with me. 

Now I have my heated blanket on ready for a reasonably early night. I have a 9am lecture tomorrow so I want to feel refreshed, and hopefully be able to walk to the lecture too. 

Fingers crossed!

Becca x

Day #316

Hey there!

My second year of uni started today, with two hours of lectures. It was the beginning of the module called 'sustainability and resilience', which holds promise. It's the sort of topic that I want to have a career in, so hopefully it'll be as interesting as I hope. 

This evening we had a few people round and it was really nice. We just relaxed watching some television and just chatting, super lovely. It's nice to properly spend time with people without alcohol or lectures. 

Adios,

Becca x

Day #*315*

Hey there!

Sorry for being MIA recently. After having a week in Crete with Will it's been non stop really. Two days back in England and it was back to University, and since then it's just been settling back in. From today I'll try to get back on to this, even if not a lot is happening right now. Back to lectures tomorrow though so that's something! There are only 50 days left to do this now so there's no point in giving up now. 

Sleep well,

Becca x

Day #314

Hey there!

Today has been based around the fact that I go on holiday tomorrow, and that's exciting. Will and I are going on our first holiday together to Puskopiano in Crete. 

Dad and I went into town for last minute shopping and checking of money, before starting to pack as soon as we got home. I had my clothes sorted anyway so it was just getting all the other bits together and in my suitcase. I also picked up my train ticket to get to Gatwick tomorrow, wild times. 

I'm sad to be leaving my dad alone, but I always seek comfort in the fact that my dog will still be there. Also, my mum will be back in a few days so it won't be too long he is alone. 

As we're off on holiday I am unsure as to whether I will get a chance to blog or not. I will try to keep as up to date as possible though!

Yamas!

Becca x

Day #313

Hey there!

I have had a lovely day today, despite still feeling ill and a bit down from the breakdown yesterday. It was family time today though so it was easier to be positive. 

We went for a walk along the newly opened refurbished Harbour Arm in Folkestone, which has a load of pop up food and drink shops as well as entertainment. After looking around we wandered to Rocksalt where we sat and had a drink, just enjoying spending time together chatting. On our way back to the car we shared some fresh chips and it was just lovely. 

Since then my sister has gone home, and my mother has gone away for work. I won't see Em for a few months now, and I won't get to see my mother until I get back from holiday. It's sad but unfortunately it just how everything is working out at the moment. 

The first photo today is one I took on my proper camera that I haven't used in a while. We have two sunflowers in our garden, and as the sun was out this morning bees were a-buzzing. I managed to get up close and love the colours of the photo, it's the first photo in a while I've felt genuinely proud of. 

I hope you've had a good weekend,

Becca x

Day #312

Hey there. 

I woke up in a good mood today, but unfortunately it didn't last. When I got home from Wills I decided to try my bikinis on to see how they looked, and it initiated a breakdown. I haven't looked at myself in the mirror and felt sick in a good few weeks so my self confidence has taken a big hit today. I'm trying to be positive but the thought of being in public in a bikini scares the hell out of me. I know I've come far from where I started but it's just not enough. 

Apart from that I've done a few little things today. I had my haircut, changed some money for holiday, and baked. We were given apples from another neighbour so as my sister is here I made an apple crumble. It was super good again, and my mother said it may be better than the first one! I also took the dog out with my sister to get some fresh air. It was nice to be outside, as well as getting to talk to her properly. 

I'm a bit cold and worried I'm coming down with something so I'm in bed getting ready to fall asleep. Sleep well,

Becca x

Day #311

Hey there. 

My sister came home for a doctors appointment today, so we managed to spend a little bit of time together and go into town. Apart from that the day was pretty relaxing. 

This evening I headed over to Deal. It was one of my girl friends birthdays a few weeks ago so we went for a meal and a couple of drinks. I haven't felt close with them for a long time for various reasons, but it was nice to be invited out and get to talk to them again properly. It also worked out well as it meant Will picked me up from town and we're settling down for cuddles now as its so cold. 

Have a good weekend,

Becca x

Day #310

Hey there!

Today has been another long day, but I'm so happy I've been able to spend some time back in Aberystwyth. We had breakfast at my parents hotel first thing, before heading back to fine to sort stuff out. Mother and I wandered into town to get a few last bits, then we cleared the house and got on the road. 

After a few hours in the car I got to spend some time with my grandparents and auntie which was super lovely. Nothing special happened but just sitting in the kitchen talking with a cup of tea was relaxing. We had dinner then got back on the road, so I've just got back home. 

I'm super tired so sleep time for me!

Becca x

Day #309

Hey there!

After an early night and early start, I'm happily back at university. My parents and I unpacked the car, and started putting everything in the right place. We found that we needed a few bits and pieces so headed into town to get lunch and then the useful items. Mum and dad checked into the hotel, then we went back to my house so we could relax and I napped. 

This evening we walked into town for dinner. We went to Wiff Waff for a burger and beer and it was super tasty. As the lunch we had was so big we weren't initially hungry so had a walk along the promenade and a play on the 2p machines in the pier. I've had such a wonderful day today, and look forward to tomorrow. 

See you later,

Becca x

Day #308

Hey there!

I have just got to my nans, and I'm so happy to see her. I haven't had a chance to see my grandad yet but hopefully I'll see him tomorrow morning. I'm here with my parents as we are moving my stuff to my new uni house tomorrow. We'll be leaving super early so I need to sleep soon. The main body of today has been getting stuff I needed to bring with me and packing, so crazy fun. 

I'm off to sleep,

Becca x

Day #307

Hey there,

Today was my last shift at P&O for the summer. I have been there for the past eleven/twelve weeks, so it's strange to be unemployed again. There was a strike in Calais last night which has had a back logged impact so it wasn't the easiest shift but oh well! It's been terrible weather so nothing else has happened today - just work then relaxing. 

I hope you've had a good bank holiday weekend,

Becca x

Day #306

Hey there!

Today I have had a wonderful day. It was date day for Will and I, so we got to spend some proper time together. We went for lunch at Gibsons Farm Shop in Wingham, which had a lovely relatively small tea rooms with brilliant food. On the way back to Wills House, we stopped off at Fowlmead Country Park. There we went for the cutest walk around the park, just spending time together. 

Other than that we've just relaxed and spent time together today, which I definitely needed. I have my last shift at work tomorrow so I'm feeling positive!

A bientot

Becca x

Day #305

Hey there!

I was up and out early this morning, as I had my last eight hour shift of the summer. It wasn't too bad actually, as it started off quite constant which made it go quicker. As the shift went on it got quieter and quieter so I had time to do other bits and pieces, such as checking emails, student finance and keeping an eye on the football scores. Will went to Ipswich today to watch the team play at home, so I did the supporting I could from work - with a constant commentary and update live streaming. 

As soon as I got home I got mother to join me on a dog walk. I really started to ache half way round our favourite circuit, but I pushed on through. I will get fitter! I've since spent my evening with my Slendertone on again, but I've had to take it off earlier than hoped as my stomach muscles are aching (in a good way). Tomorrow is weigh in day so fingers crossed!

A bientot,

Becca x

Day #304

Hey there. 

Apart from day three of four in a row of work, I've actually been relaxing. I've had my Slendertone on all morning, then had my dinner at lunch time because of the timing I was at work. When I got home tonight mother and I took the dog out. It's pretty creepy walking around the village when it's dark now as they've started turning all the street lights off. THis meant we only stayed on the main road up to the memorial, but some exercise is better than none. 

Ciao,

Becca x

Day #303

Hey there. 

Appalling weather again today. Dad and I went out on another adventure today though, to get my stuff for uni. It was just getting all cleaning products and toiletries that were needed to begin next year. I feel like I've got a few things to get sorted before I move most of my bits to uni on Tuesday. Again this evening was work, which was fine. I ended up being there late but I get paid a whole extra £2 for that so silver lining!

Adios,

Becca x

Day #302

Hey there.  

The weather has been horrific today. Dad and I went food shopping, our usual Wednesday activity now, which was fun as always. I've been back to work today though, on my first day on of four. It's been okay as I'm not in too much pain so hopefully I'll be staying positive till the end of the four days. 

Aloha,

Becca x

Day #301

Hey there!

Day two in London today! This morning started with the best breakfast buffet I have ever seen, such a wide variety of foods and drinks it was brilliant. 

Mother and I went to central London where we went looking for a watch for me for Christmas, and I think we found one. We then went for a drink just outside Picaddily Circus, where we were actually the only people in the bar despite the weather and quality of drinks there. We got stuck in the rain so had to run into M&M world, which was quite fun actually. Next stop was the National Portrait Gallery to see the BP Portrait Award, one of my favourite exhibitions of the year. 

This afternoon we went to the Wellcome Collection, for afternoon tea in the 'Kitchen'. It was a brilliant and super tasty, but so much that we bought home our petit fours. We were so tired that we both napped on the train though, but it was a wonderful few days away. 

Sleep well,

Becca x

Day #300

Hey there!

Today is my mothers birthday, so we went to London to celebrate. It's been a super long day full of lots of cocktails and cool stuff. 

We went straight to the hotel when we got to the city, and it started the day wonderfully. We had actually been upgraded to the highest room which was amazing, and this gave us club lounge access too! Lots of free food and alcohol was therefore consumed over the day. 

We went to the Tate Modern with my sister, and it was wonderful to see real Andy Warhol art. Then back to the hotel for more alcohol and getting ready for the night ahead. We got a taxi to the Shard, where we had cocktails believe it or not. Then over to Leicester Square to go to the theatre - a new play called the Mentalists. It was a weird and wonderful dark comedy with only two actors, one of them being Stephen Merchant and Steffan Rhodei (Dave from Daves coaches on Gavin and Stacy). We then met my cousin and had yet more drinks. 

It has been such a lovely day and I can't wait to sleep,

Becca x

Day #299

Hey there!

This morning we went on a lovely family dog walk around the village. Dad very rarely comes out with us, so it made me very happy that he did today. It was also good because he was slow like me so I didn't feel pressured to keep up with mother. 

When we got back I was super tired, but I decided to bake. One of our neighbours had given us some of his home grown apples, so I decided to use them today. I made an apple crumble - and honestly it was pretty awesome. It wasn't too sweet, and the crumble was cooked almost perfectly. I may be blowing my own trumpet but it was one of the best crumbles I've ever tasted. 

Mum and I went out for another walk this evening with the dog. Scoobie has been such a pain in the arse recently, being so needy, but we wanted to go out so we had to give into her. She almost jumped off of the cliff twice tonight and I've never panicked so much, for such a clever dog she is such an imbecile at times.

Tomorrow is mums birthday so we are off to London for two days. We'll be meeting my sister and hopefully my cousin too, so it should be good. 

Sleep well,

Becca x 

Day #298

Hey there. 

I don't really happened to me today, but I had a really big dip. I couldn't bring myself to go to work mentally or physically, and it just made everything worse. I hate letting people down, but unfortunately I had to put myself first. I couldn't even face it, and honestly I didn't really care - which really is terrible.

I've tried to keep myself busy doing other stuff to perk me up though. I've done some tidying of my room as it was too hot outside, and cooked dinner. As it cooled this evening I even went out for a walk. It was a bit longer than initially planned, and I'll probably regret it tomorrow, but it was nice to not be in a ridiculous amount of back pain whilst doing such a simple activity. Other than that I've been trying to relax, and trying to focus on the positives - which is something I really usually struggle with. 

Onwards and upwards. 

Becca x

Day #297

Hey there. 

Today had an early start, as I had the dentist. It was good start to the day, especially as the sun was just coming out and it was getting warmer. As the weather improved I got to go out into the garden and just wander around (which I love doing), taking in the nature and the sun. There are such gorgeous butterflies around here at the moment, I'm guessing which is because of how many flowers we have outside. 

Tonight I'm off over to Wills again. His best friend and girlfriend are going to be there, so I've been informed that 'chilled drinks' will be occurring... Let's see how this turns out. 

Until tomorrow,

Becca x

Day #296

Hey there!

My back pain is decreasing (finally) but I'm still pretty damn unwell. I've had such bad stomach pains it's been hard to do stuff, but I've been forcing myself through it. I had a late afternoon shift at work, which meant I finished at 5, which wasn't too bad when it got busier. I also have tomorrow off which is a plus. 

I went straight over to wills after work as tonight was date night. He drove us over to Canterbury, and we tried out a well reviewed Mexican restaurant. I wasn't crazily hungry, but we had just the right amount of food - amazing shared nachos then I had a beef taco and Will had two too. Once we got back to his I suddenly felt more ill which sucked, but he was very caring and looked after me. I'm now curled up in bed just praying for sleep. 

Adios,

Becca x

Day #295

Hey there. 

Okay so my photo today is a bit of a cheat, but it makes me so happy. I love baking, and love the Great British Bake Off, and this was the special commendation of the week. A lion made out of bread - amazing!

This was genuinely the highlight of my day as I haven't been very well. I did have to go to work today which was uncomfortable as it wasn't busy meaning I had nothing to distract me. This led to an evening of a pharmacy trip, and watching food programmes despite feeling unwell. 

I hope the bread lion made you smile like I did,

Becca x

Day #294

Hey there,

Nothing excited has happened today sadly. Dad and I did the weekly shop which was wild as always, and then I had work. Today was my last late shift until Saturday so that has made it a bit better. The new manager, when she does these shifts too, always lets you go as soon as the phones are shut off which is another plus I guess. 

Sweet dreams,

Becca x

Day #293

Hey there!

I have had a lovely day. I am still trying to push through the pain, and want to do so by not sitting around as much. This meant I managed to actually do some baking today, which I've wanted to do for ages. I made one of the tastiest simple cakes in ages, a lemon drizzle loaf cake - it is pretty delicious. 

Will and I also spent some time together today which makes me very content. After many a discussion we settled on visiting the Horby Museum, which isn't something is usually go for but it had Scalextric there and lots of interactive activities that I loved. Afterwards we drove into Margate town and just had a little walk around. My cousin was there and luckily we managed to literally bump into him at a crossing. I never get to see him so it made me super happy, just to have five minutes to talk to him properly in person. 

When we got back to Wills we were still so excited from the museum that he went straight into the loft and got his old Scalextric track and cars out. We spent ages setting up the track, but when we put the cars and connected the power source it was a sad sight. There just wasn't enough power for the cars so we had to pack it up there and then. 

Sleep well,

Becca x

Day #292

Hey there!

I've had an absolutely lovely morning. To try and battle the pain and still get healthier, I went into Canterbury with my parents. When we got there most shops were still shut so we ended up going for breakfast at a wonderful little pancake house. I've never been so full afterwards, but it meant I barely ate until dinner which is good. We did some walking and shopping which was lovely, but by the end it was too painful and we had to go. 

The rest of the day was spent trying to recoup. After a little nap dinner was served, then mother and I went for a walk. I forced myself to go, even though it was slow, as I need to get my strength back. 

I hope you've had a good weekend!

Becca x

Day #291

Hey there!

This morning I was majorly lazy, as I had my long weekend shift today. I was due in from 2-10, a late close which I'm used to at the moment, but it wasn't good. I have once again been in a lot of pain, and by 8pm I was having such bad issues as I couldn't use my right arm, I had to leave. It was difficult to get home but it was necessary as I had to relax. Hopefully tomorrow when I wake up I'll be feeling a bit better. 

Good night,

Becca x

Day #290

Hey there.

Nothing crazy to report today. I've been in a lot of pain (still), so just been relaxing this morning. I had work this evening which was super fun, so I needed to make sure I was up to it. Initially I was supposed to go to Wills tonight so that we could go into Deal with his friends , however plans changed so I've come home alone straight after work. 

The weekend is here!

Becca x

Day #289

Hey there. 

The weather has been crazy today, loads of thunder, lightening and rain. It's been on and off all day, which was super fun as will and I went out today. He came to pick me up and we went to the Ashford Outlet, after popping in to see his grandparents. We both bought a few items, which we actually set out to get (apart from a top I got). Will is off out tonight so we didn't get to chill at home afterwards, but hopefully he'll have a good night as its results day so Canterbury will be crazy busy. 

The weekend is nearly here!

Becca x

Day #286

Hey there. 

I'm still in a lot of pain and getting very frustrated. I feel so useless and no matter what can't seem to work my words out, everything just feels like a struggle. I was in from 4-10 today and I feel like it was my breaking point. I spoke to my manager and have reduced my hours to the lowest possible, as I just can't cope. There is no point in quitting though as I only have three weeks left, so I might as well earn some more money while I can.  

Sleep well,

Becca x

Day #288

Hey there. 

This is crazy for me to be sharing a photo of myself in a bikini. Hopefully it'll be another push for myself to lose some more before holiday, and I want to be able to share a visible change. My Body confidence is on the increase though which is good. 

Today I officially sent off my application for a Blue Badge. It was recommended to me by my DSA assessor because of the difficulties I have walking. I really hope it's successful as it could really help me. It meant I had to have a passport photo taken though which I wasn't so please about, but I think it's one f the best I've had taken (positive thinking, right?). My dad had to go to the dentist so we went to sort it out then, but once again I was so ridiculously slow I couldn't keep up with him which is very frustrating to me. 

Anyway, another day off tomorrow thank fully. Sleep well,

Becca x

Day #287

Hey there. 

I stayed at wills last night, and he made me super happy by getting some lovely rose for when I finished work. It was a good relax but sleeping in a different bed with my pain wasn't the best, he is worth it though. 

Today's excitement was going food shopping with my father, crazy times. We're both slow and steady though so it works out well, and mum gets to stay home and work. I also had work today for four hours which was fine, but it just meant I had to have dinner super early v

That's all from me,

Becca x

Day #285

Hey there!

Back to the call centre today for me, on my first ever late shift. I'm in today from 2pm-10pm, so hopefully it won't be too hard. Apart from work I've just been relaxing today, trying to get rid of this damn pain. I forced myself to go out for a walk but I couldn't go far and my mother actually left me to walk home as she carried on, so that made me feel great. 

Hope you're Sunday has been good,

Becca x